Ticker, American Beauty, Billy Elliot, Being John Malkovich & The Fifth Element

Ticker

         Action. Tom Sizemore & Steven Seagal 2001

        Plenty of bombs. This is not a Steven Seagal movie, still better than a lot of action movies. A bit slow at one and a half hours.

        Moral of the story: Beware of Michael Angelo

        Rating: Average

        Rent it? Yes

        Buy it? No


American Beauty

         Comedy. Kevin Spacey & Annette Bening 1999

        A man discovers he has the life of a drone. His wife has an affair. His daughter discovers love. Long at two hours. Comedy Rating 2

        Moral of the story: It's not over till the closet door is open.

        Rating: Quite average

        Rent it? If you must

        Buy it? No


Billy Elliot

         Drama. Julie Walters & Gary Lewis 2000

        Typical teenager. Doesn't want to box, wants to dance. Friends of both sexes are trying to get into his pants. Long, long, long at one and three quarter hours. Comedy Rating 1.9

        Moral of the story: Your in trouble once your nuts crack.

        Rating: One yawn

        Rent it? 50, 50, but I win, bye

        Buy it? No


Being John Malkovich

         Comedy. John Cusack & Cameron Diaz 1999

        Weird. Too long. Comedy Rating -1

        Moral of the story: Some movies just shouldn't be made.

        Rating: Ejected it

        Rent it? No

        Buy it? No


The Fifth Element

         Sci Fi. Bruce Willis & Milla Jovovich 1999

        All life is about to be destroyed. Die Hard with exotic and weird characters. Comedy Rating 0.75

        Moral of the story: The supreme being needs love.

        Rating: Quite average

        Rent it? Yes

        Buy it? No




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The opinions expressed here are just that, opinions.

The length of a video, if stated, is the length quoted on the ' box ' and may not correspond with the actual length.

Ratings in descending order:

Eye popper

Entertaining

Average

Quite average

One yawn

Two yawns

Three yawns

Ejected it